How does a woman working amongst hundreds of men remain a woman in her true essence? 
In a turn of thought, I began this writing headed in one direction and somehow headed a different way. I REALLY intended to criticize women in professions inherently male in their culture. But in doing so, I felt it would be unfair to the standout women I have worked with over the years who I will highlight, such as my worksite’s vice-chair, GiGi.
She is labor representation for about seven hundred union members at my place of employment.
But more important than that, a wife, and a mother to two US Marines. I’ve never heard her curse, or yell, or behave in an unladylike manner. And she gets things done.
Respect.
In the future I will come back to the discussion about masculine women, but for now, somehow, my hands moved in a Ouija Board manner across my laptop. The flow bought me to a spotlight of women I have worked with through my life and strangely, the cosmos arranged that this should occur during ‘Women’s History Month’.
At one time in the union office at my place of employment hung a poster that read, “If you complimented me when I did right, I would not then rebuke you when you point out my wrong”. With that concept in mind, I extend a compliment.
Ladies, stay ladylike. I have worked a number of blue-collar professions and observed that when in masculine environs, some women absorb male characteristics and behaviors, losing their feminine nature. For the woman in a blue-collar profession, holding her feminine demeanor is a challenging balance to maintain. I speak of the ‘lady’ in the truest sense of that description, the member of the female sorority born a female and groomed to be a lady of grace and manners and class. But in her career, she has within her a calling to be part of a male innovation that mechanically or scientifically builds, supports, or sustains life, through provision of products, services, or security. And they navigate this while simultaneously respecting but staying out of the realm of masculinity.
I know a number of these women, who in their effectiveness never lost their natural feminine identity or inclination to be ladylike. They were women were an asset to the team, without being consumed by the male culture of the team. Never adopting the abrasiveness of blue-collar manner, never picking up the haughtiness of manliness, never changing their outlook to the cynicism of male blue-collar existence. And even soothing male colleagues by highlighting their value from a woman’s perspective.
I attended a trade high school whose student body was about ninety-eight percent male. Aviation High School in Queens in 1980 had about forty female students-in a class of about two thousand. I almost remember every one of those girls, but I’ll highlight one in particular: Sonora, a bright Hispanic girl the color of light coffee, a big smile, a mix of South American and African features, and very down to earth–despite being a ‘bun’ in a roomful of ‘hot dogs’. I remember her in welding class wearing the thick white coveralls that were supposed to stop hot metal from landing on you—and a few hours later at dismissal she would climb out of those overalls wearing a modest white chiffon blouse, tight jeans, and earrings.
Later in life, I became an Army Reservist, in a combat support military police unit. Again, there were a small number of female Soldiers. Three of them stood out because they were in top physical condition and were what we called “Hard Chargers”. All three would engage in the grittiest of training with high levels of motivation, and all three could have been models for Lara Croft, the Tomb Raider. And after two weeks of summer training each would transform into a dignified and attractive woman capable of collecting free drinks at the highest-class bars or lounges. Among them was my lifelong friend and colleague who at the time was Staff Sergeant Francia D., now Dr. Francia H. 
She camped in the woods with us, got bitten by ticks with us. When we were deployed to Iraq she lived in a tent with us, and day after day rode into hostile territory with us.
Later I was mentored by the late Command Sergeant Major Deborah J. Wilcox. A consummate professional, CSM Wilcox guided the development of the enlisted members of the battalion without need to show she was tougher than every male in sight. She could bark when needed, but in our one-on-one leadership sessions, she coached me with her gentle southern accent.
Debra lost a fight with illness years ago and has a scholarship fund in her name: Sgt. Major Debra J. Wilcox Scholarship Fund – AnnieRuth Foundation.
My duty took me to an instructor unit, and at the top of my battalion Non-Commissioned Officer support channel was Command Sergeant Major Carol C.
Another solid leader, she was positive, feminine, but could be 
quite firm when needed (I watched her lock some heels). CSM Carol was committed to the Army ethic, was unmistakably feminine, she never needed to become a man to get her job done.
Still dedicated to her husband in retirement, she lives a quiet God-fearing life in Maryland, I remember how womanly she looked in mess blue uniform with ruffled blouse. Even in the rigidity of the Army, she found a way (within regulations) to stay ladylike. [on r. is COL (Ret.) Phyllis (Ragland) Alford, 9-80 Health Services Battalion].
Most proud am I of my oldest daughter. 
When she told me of her decision to join the Army, I recommended that she try the United States Navy or Air Force. Those branches can be rough-n-tough, but this man’s Army is exclusively dirt and mud and living in a tent. But, before I knew it she threw herself in, and though I thought it would be too grimy for her, this soft voiced kitten did it. She made it through basic training, and Signals school, and wound up in the Tenth Mountain Division, Fort Drum NY. Above right is her in bivouac performing cold weather warfare training. And she is ALL girl. And now a veteran like me.
In my current employment at New York City Transit, I share the workplace with a fair amount of female co-workers, and though vastly outnumbered by men, they somehow remain women. 
Some of my female co-workers change hairstyles more frequently than their well-heeled professional peers. Traci and Nikki (L and R), seem like they change ‘do’s every four days. Traci on the left is quite even tempered, and I’ve never heard her speak with a salty tongue. Nikki on the right always smiles and again, no salty speech leaves her mouth (I’ve never heard it). These two along with most of the ladies have no desire to emulate the traits of men (Nods to Danielle, Miriam, Charita, Katrina, Aida and a few more). Some keep themselves in good physical condition, and a surprising amount broadened their world perceptions by purchasing one or both of my books.
Unfortunately, there are some, who curse rather liberally, and a few are emotionally explosive. Sadly, a few more seem to have given up on femininity. But I will attribute those to the challenges of a world gone mad. And really, I began this piece of writing intending to question those women. But I became consumed with a calling to be positive, and instead I want to point the spotlight at those I feel get it right.
For a few years I worked at New York City Department of Correction, and there were a number of standout female officers; but, in the harshness of a jail, most had become men in women’s skin. 
The necessity for boldness and the minute-by-minute potential for violence had wiped away their feminine side, such that even when not on facility property they were still overly aggressive and at times downright nasty. Their demeanor was unattractive, and I describe most of them as unladylike. 
They had done what they had to psychologically to survive in their profession, but they had been transformed completely, in a way that no woman should.
Even when at social events or holiday parties, hair ‘done up’ and wearing gowns, they could be heard loudly telling jail stories and cursing. Their mannerisms and interactions were like men in a bar watching football, and some were even physically belligerent in public. Ultimately, they are what they are, but the question remains, is that what they set out to be?
Yes, I still see gender in through a binary lens.
And I will continue to articulate what I see as an unwise movement that seeks respect in disrupting the natural order, and converting beautiful women into gruff men. That movement is opposed to excelling in its role as part of the natural order, that being women, wives, mothers.
Yet, I am still amazed at the care with which most of my female co-workers present themselves to the world each morning. And most of these female counterparts are polite, and smile (Nahima, Sapphire, Tiffany), and unless pushed unfairly are gentle and caring creatures (Charita, Aida). And they throw good parties.
There are more, and I have undoubtedly made enemies by unintentionally leaving some out, I hope they don’t become . . . unladylike over it . . .
Stay ladylike.
Sometimes sweaty bug-eyed black men frothing at the sight of a white woman or piece of chicken. 
In real-time media such as nightly news, “Negroes” were the criminal, the
It seemed that in the space of thirty years Socialists and Liberals had wormed their way into control positions in every facet of media. All interviews on political shows were seeded with slanted questions. News reports in print or television became more and more slanted for a left-leaning agenda. It bled over to entertainment, and the pace picked up exponentially.
President Trump (for whom I voted) declared his innocence and decried the evil ‘swamp’, but when the Central Park five were found exonerated as the result of DNA(!) evidence, did he issue a front-page apology? Remember, he paid for a full-page ad in the Daily News demanding their prosecution and reinstatement of NY State’s death penalty? Good manners and adherence to the man code dictates that the apology should match the veracity of the violation.
If we value American men fighting for freedom, why is there no monument to Nat Turner? John Brown? Robert Smalls? The only memorial I know of representing black men gallantly fighting for their freedom is the 54th Infantry Regiment monument in Boston, MA.
As a black conservative, I am occasionally asked about how to gain the “black vote”. How about recognizing our pain? Do some digging and right a previous wrong, especially if liberals did it. You get the moral high ground. I’ll jump start it: I read a book last year titled “Forgotten: The untold story of America’s Black Heroes on D-Day and back at home.” It is an incredible account of Black men who went ashore at Omaha Beach. FIRST WAVE. I SAID FIRST WAVE!
Yet as a military historian and war movie buff, I have seen three major Hollywood films about D-Day, not a single Black Soldier was even in the background. 
“Saving Private Ryan” executive produced by Steven Spielberg and starring Tom Hanks (both big time Hollywood Liberals) made no reference to them nor did the mini-series “Band of Brothers”. Neither were these men seen in “The Longest Day”, which illustrated the battle from several different perspectives—but not the Black men.
friends dressed to celebrate an occasion, a milestone. 
They have aspired to and maintained the moments in culture that are special and prepare for them enthusiastically and treat those moments with reverence. This day is special, it holds reverence in their eyes, and they treat it accordingly. Guests arrived from near and far, and initially I was put off by the cars parked up and down my street and in front of my house, but when I saw how pristine and dignified they looked; I was touched and humbled. 
Though this moment was happening in their humble backyard, peeking over the fence from another neighbor’s house we could see the property was decorated as though in Southern France. Everyone was in a suit or a dress, haircuts and hairdos, hushed voices in the eighty-four degree sun.
Sophisticated Americans? 
Instead of a jacket and button up shirt, should I be like the congregant who wears his favorite plaid flannel shirt and cargo shorts? What is the problem with attending worship dressed like a gentleman? I am uncomfortable when I am NOT in this attire. To add to the frustration, our new pastor was chided for wearing a very regal robe because, “It’s summer out, aren’t you hot?” My wife was questioned about her shoes, “You still wear heels? I don’t see how you do it”.
My son has an eye for style but lost his personal taste for gentleman’s clothing because he showed up at school dances being the ONLY one in shoes. He wasn’t even in a suit, just shoes, jeans and a slim fitting blazer. His peer group arrived in their favorite t-shirts, and he was disappointed to be one of only a few appropriately dressed. And this angered me because I often hear adults and especially parents complain about this very issue. Disappointed because girls don’t wear dresses and the boys look sloppy.
of worship, our loud talk would pause because one of our group would announce, “Hey respect the church, respect God.” And as filled with beer as we were, but should not have been, our voices would hush a bit until we were clear of whichever sanctuary we were passing before the foul mouths resumed. Last Sunday, several times service was tainted by outside noise from roaring obnoxiously loud motorcycles, car stereos blasting loud and vulgar music, and cackling passers-by. A lack of reverence or at least respect.
Absolutely nothing is worthy of respect or effort on anyone’s part. Burn the flag. Ridicule holidays. Cursing at the world in music. Young ladies in the supermarket in see-through leggings or pajamas–the women of my day would not be caught dead in such dishevelment!
Young men with their pants sagging sloppily. But these same people want the world to be a ‘better place’. Burning down Police Stations–irreverence. Raiding the Capitol! Is nothing sacred?
These public displays are not humility, these are arrogance and irreverence, like the infamous millennial ‘f*** you flip flops’. 
The standards you flaunt today will be the standards your cry for tomorrow.
This trend was reflected in popular music, and in 1981 Prince penned a song on his “Controversy” album titled “Ronnie [Reagan] talk to Russia” (see track 2 left). This song begged that Ronald Reagan talk to and compromise with the Soviet Union. Many left leaning Americans of the day were of the mind that Ronald Reagan, Conservatives, and the so-called ‘military industrial complex’ was the source of nuclear war tensions. Every Republican president since has been painted as an evil warmonger, and whichever nation presented a leader who countered an American president, especially if Republican, had the sometimes-overt admiration of the segment of disgruntled Americans. Remember the invitation of Iran’s Ahmadinejad to speak at Colombia University? The black community harbors a secret love for Cuba and the now deceased Fidel Castro. More recently, the American leftist movement, Citgo, and Joseph P. Kennedy embraced Hugo Chavez. Do you remember the press almost laughing at our own President, George W. Bush, when a Muslim reporter threw a shoe at him?
Russia and China supported North Korea’s invasion of South Korea, and then North Vietnam’s invasion of South Vietnam. But you hated your own country so much that you rationalized our growing enemy. Remember that bum Jane Fonda?
You have told everyone you can that the real enemy is America/Republicans/Conservatives/the Police/the Military/Capitalism/The CIA/FBI/Banks/Corporations/Donald Trump! Never mind that the CIA has described the former Russian bear as now descended to a ‘crime-state’ under the leadership of former KGB officer Vladimir Putin.
She’s there because of you, and your hidden love for socialism and no-so-hidden hatred for 50% of your country that politically disagrees with you.
And they steered around challenging men. And that is the axis of this issue. America, and the world, is becoming more and more accepting of homosexuality, but that was with the unspoken understanding that it would not challenge heterosexuality. But we now have these interesting tweets from the ladies at BLM (Bisexual/Lesbian Manipulators) suggesting that their imprisoned heroine is better than men, and that we are letting her languish because of that. We have ‘Emma’ in an Army recruitment video, who thinks her marches in San Francisco for her two ‘Moms’ shows she’s a fighter and should be a Soldier.
I should be clear, my animus is not at homosexuality per se, but at what I now see is the attempt to usurp male position. Secondarily, a pernicious campaign to pass off this behavior as ‘normal’. I do not suggest that the alternate lifestyle community does not have the right to pursue their happiness; see my essay ‘A National Divorce’. The problem comes when the basic building block of human existence is pushed aside by culture, and then corrupted science, to promote the abnormal.
That wasn’t a bunch of lesbians on those I-beams building New York’s skyscrapers, nor was it lesbians building dams, or mining coal, or on some pitching fishing boat off the coast of Alaska catching fish and crab–it was men. AND ONE SEASON IT WAS ONE WOMAN. 
Conversely, it’s not men on delivery tables in hospitals giving babies to the world, that’s women. Men have no desire to usurp women’s prestige as the womb of life. Men were, and still are, busy bringing every bit of infrastructure you, and we enjoy today. Women birthed every life you, and we enjoy today. Men are born with not just inherent abilities, but also inherent responsibilities, just as the same must be said of women.
Before I write another word, I think we’re better together (see my blog post ‘a case for man and woman’), but we’re on the verge of being history’s most insane domestic violence call. Unless we want this family named America ruined forever, we need to separate mommy and daddy before something really bad happens.
That is not to say that the Irish were not frowned upon, and certainly Italians were denigrated, not even being counted as Caucasian until 1934–before that the census counted that group as “latins”. But they were still all from Europe.
The marriage of the United States has reached the point of irreconcilable differences, and if we don’t separate the belligerents the house of America will turn into the world’s largest murder-suicide domestic violence call.
Residency would require 51% confirned African DNA and no interracial couples. Gun ownership mandatory–as Stokely Carmicahael the Black Panther said in his speech at Berkeley: “Ya’ll try to play that shit again, this time we playin’ back”. Representatives and Senators of this state must be 70% African American.
For my Boricua hermanos y hermanas, let’s stop playing–Puerto Rico needs to be a state. You know how much your tourism economy would explode? If you can demonstrate a solid Republic presence and reliable vote–it would happen within months. 
San Francisco could become it’s own state and dedicated to the Alternate lifestyle community. That new state’s residents must be populated by those sympathetic to the alternate lifestyle community, and send ONLY declared and confirmed alternate lifestyle representatives to congress.
I came to my own revelation of sorts as I got pulled into my wife and daughter’s excitement, watching as the event came down to Russian and Chinese skaters. They gasped as a Russian man held his female partner aloft with one hand as they glided across the Beijing ice. I’ll call them Vladimir and Evgenia. More gasps were emitted as Vladimir released her and recaptured Evgenia at his hip as she gracefully posed in a horizontal position, red lipstick smile prominent against the backdrop of her complexion and the ice.
This would not work with two women. Nor with two men. Twenty years ago that would not need to be stated; today that’s not entirely obvious. Vladimir was larger than Evgenia, his thighs almost as powerful as Barry Sanders. Evgenia was petite and slim. Each was built for their role, reversal is not possible: Evgenia is not going to hold Vladimir above her head, and he is not going to look good in a skirt and lipstick. I present to you the obvious–A Man, and a Woman.
Women see the work men do as a given; we’re supposed to do what we do. It just happens, and they are entitled to it. Women have little appreciation of men and what men do to enable their survival and set the table for their excellence.
And in that order. There is a visible campaign by feminists to grab any and all young women and recruit them for the ‘strong woman’ crusade. This is where the ‘wrote our own vows’ movement began. 
I looked at their photos, and they look happy. I mean really happy. Where do you see that in our times, these times of desperate housewives and athletes with groupies and baby mommas. I do not know the young man’s history so I’m going on a limb in saying he seems like a decent guy. He’s not in the news for trouble or hanging out with rappers. He dated Simone, then put a ring on it. Simone is always smiling, doesn’t pop up in the gossip columns, and looks ecstatic. She appreciates that a man wants to hold her high! They are the embodiment of the themes portrayed by those figure skaters.
At an early age, they are seduced by a counterfeit lifestyle, and they continue seek the ease of that irresponsible life as adults. They still crave the wolves who infected them for life. In his world she can be irresponsible—anywhere else she is accountable and behave like a lady. With him she can ‘pop off’ at the mouth and get her maniac street thug on you if you dare say something back. 
faddish clothing that would not survive in a normal world, and celebrations every night when responsible people are resting for work the next day. Who would say no to this?
If you name the most prominent and beautiful women in urban culture, none are involved with their proper counterpart. Not one is with a man described as a ‘gentleman’. Beyonce’ is with Jay-Z, admitted street thug and drug dealer— “I did e’ry bit a crime I writ in mine, ran so much coke, I could shit a dime” (from Funkmaster Flex mixtape vol II). 
Ciara famously married rapper ‘Future’ and became his THIRD(!) baby momma. Kim Kardashian and Kanye West, Alicia Keys and Swizz Beats (the producer of DMX and Rough Riders). Foxy Brown, Nikki Minaj, Vivica Fox, etc. None of them sought black ‘gentlemen’. They were bitten by the wolves “in them streets”.
Like many modern inventions of language, it suggests progress toward a goal. The intersection of these efforts focuses on where two groups, or movements, or creeds meet. Theoretically, after attainment of stated goals, each of us goes our separate way happy, or hopefully together forever happy.
looking down the sights of your weapon results in missing your target by substantially more the further the round (line) travels. At three hundred meters, you could be as much as one meter off target.
e of his lectures wherein he presented this philosophical concept: When something happens in the world, individually you’re not responsible—but as part of a group, you are. We all contribute to our world and culture, and what we love flourishes, what we ignore dies. If we push Dr. Peterson’s concept further out, we’re not all responsible–but we are.
But we help promote it. Ask yourself, when your children were impressionable, what did you expose them to musically? What music did you enjoy IN THEIR PRESENCE? In my job serving the public, I witness cars cruising past elementary schools playing songs with lyrics that are heinous. Fathers with their child(ren) wearing a screen-printed t-shirt with DMX or Biggie Smalls glorified on it. Young mothers wearing t-shirts with Tupac’s image, sometimes holding two pistols. 